You think you might be pregnant, or maybe you’re just about to start your period. Then you miss your period and your boobs start hurting, you are tired all the time, one minute you feel elated, the next you are crying. Are these the early signs of pregnancy? Then you do the test and yes, there are two pink lines – you can justify everything now as you are indeed pregnant. Mr Cranky looked at me with I-told-you-so-eyes when I showed him the stick. A massive smile appeared on his face, like “look at me I am a superstar spermanator.” I, on the otherhand, had a look of shock on my face as it dawned on me: that I promised him that he could call the baby whatever he wanted if he got me pregnant in the first month of trying. In a very big nutshell, that’s what happened to me.
Welcome to Cranky Cankles – a creation to hopefully make you smile, make you laugh along with all my body changes and crankiness which I didn’t expect to happen because they don’t show this stuff in the movies. Quick disclaimer: I am not a medical professional and I am not providing any advice – simply informal stories on what has worked for me or – in most cases – what has not worked for me. Every pregnancy is different… so you might not ever get cranky or develop cankles (lucky you!).
By day, my profession is that of a coach: I try to inspire others to reach their goals and overcome both personal and professional hurdles. By night, especially by week 6 of my pregnancy, you could say my profession is that of a cranky monster – which I have never been before nor would I inspire anyone to be. But there are hormones surging around my body and they creep up from nowhere and can take over with no warning and then just as quickly disappear. These early signs of pregnancy lead to my first cranky episode which was SPECTACULAR.
My very patient and wonderful partner Mr Cranky had just walked our 4-month-old puppy. He came back full of joy as he said he finally met the beautiful dog and equally beautiful owner I have mentioned to him a couple of times. Out of nowhere and with no warning signs, a surge of fully-blown crank hit me – it nearly knocked me out. I was seething! How dare Mr Cranky mention a beautiful woman to me? Doesn’t he know I am at that point bloated, fatigued and nauseous?! Tears streamed, anger boiled and then the crank monster appeared and took us both by surprise. So much so, I was inspired to create this website since we all need to learn to celebrate (and laugh at) our cranks.
Once the first crank subsided there was much needed laughter. I apologised profusely to Mr Cranky and took myself off for a well-deserved nap – I have to say, being cranky is nearly as exhausting as being pregnant. I never knew being cranky was an early sign of pregnancy. Pregnancy is a beautiful thing but it brings with it a rollercoaster of emotions daily – sometimes even hourly. I don’t want to be cranky throughout the whole pregnancy but I fear these episodes will continue. After speaking to many others who are also pregnant, or have now moved on to motherhood, they all said they have they have a story or two to tell, so please share them here so this cranky community can grow. By sharing we can all learn to embrace – and even celebrate – our cranky.
Woohoo! I did it! Alright, well maybe I’ll still be a relatively “old dad” but man, I still got it. I’m super excited that Miss Cranky is with child. That despite the chaos in the world around us we get to bring a life into this world. To help distract me from my corporate life working for the man (and challenge any factual inaccuracies Miss Cranky puts out there I perceive that may impugn my reputation) I may chime in from time to time to give a little alternative first-hand perspective on the aforementioned cranky hijinks. [Miss. Cranky: No, no you will be chiming in all the time as who will correct my grammar if not?!]
Well, early on I suspected something was afoot – we missed our regularly scheduled argument well before the missed period. In retrospect, this was actually more like our regularly scheduled “mild divergence of views” – I’ve had to redefine my terms along this journey. As to the trigger that led to the arrival of the first Crank, I can most definitely say that 1) the Irish Setter was one of the most beautiful dogs I’ve ever seen, a brilliantly red shining coat that elegantly billowed alongside the slender figure and 2) Miss Cranky is the only woman for me and I believe truly amongst the most gorgeous woman on the planet. Her presence engenders no comparison.
But… what a CRANK! In my opinion maybe after all crankiness is one of the early signs of pregnancy. I have never experienced anything like this before – like I said, I’m no spring chicken and would consider myself adept at navigating the ebbs and flows that are part of any relationship. But this was something different, something far more visceral, more primal. The extreme contrast from moment to moment really does lead to some comical moments. I realised I needed to brace myself for the changes to come in more ways than I expected! I hope you enjoy popping in to observe the rollercoaster ride – I fear many more cranky episodes are in store for me….